I have been given the opportunity to audition for the Shakespeare Theatre Company. My second tenure here in DC has afforded me the chance to demonstrate that I have grown as an actor. Receiving an invite from the STC is one of the great benefits of my new maturity and this “second time around”. I have prepared two pieces and have been coached by my recent director and advised by friends of the best way to execute these monologues. One thing I have tried to do is realize who I am likely to be cast as. I do this based on, well, what I have been cast as lately.
Types
While I was finishing up in Chicago I discovered that I was falling into an interesting type. I was cast, not one, two, three, or four, but FIVE times as a man who was in denial of his true sexuality. Some of these roles were “roles of a lifetime”. Some were “not so much”. I never questioned my own sexuality, but became frustrated with getting the same type of character over and over again. Looking back I now realize that I never had it some good! I was lucky that a type found me and therefore I had found my type.
Now, as I have aged and possibly become more at ease as a performer I find myself having shifted into a new type. Picture the “boy next door gone WRONG”. I’m the bad guy with a friendly face. I have been lucky enough to play several roles on both film and stage that fit this description. So, based on what others perceive me as, when casting, and what I tend to excel at, I am trying to embrace monologues that show me at my best and my most likely.
It has taken a while to come to grips with the fact that I will not get the character types that I wish I could do. I may come close, but there are roles that I will not be a first choice for and this is something that still haunts me a little, but just knowing where I stand gives me a great deal of power. I focus my energies in the probable direction. Like and athlete reserving energy for when they truly need it, I can now “know” when to fight for that role and when to tell myself: “I’m not what they are looking for”. And instead of providing myself with a self preserving mantra I can assert this as simply a statement of fact. That is comforting.
Types
While I was finishing up in Chicago I discovered that I was falling into an interesting type. I was cast, not one, two, three, or four, but FIVE times as a man who was in denial of his true sexuality. Some of these roles were “roles of a lifetime”. Some were “not so much”. I never questioned my own sexuality, but became frustrated with getting the same type of character over and over again. Looking back I now realize that I never had it some good! I was lucky that a type found me and therefore I had found my type.
Now, as I have aged and possibly become more at ease as a performer I find myself having shifted into a new type. Picture the “boy next door gone WRONG”. I’m the bad guy with a friendly face. I have been lucky enough to play several roles on both film and stage that fit this description. So, based on what others perceive me as, when casting, and what I tend to excel at, I am trying to embrace monologues that show me at my best and my most likely.
It has taken a while to come to grips with the fact that I will not get the character types that I wish I could do. I may come close, but there are roles that I will not be a first choice for and this is something that still haunts me a little, but just knowing where I stand gives me a great deal of power. I focus my energies in the probable direction. Like and athlete reserving energy for when they truly need it, I can now “know” when to fight for that role and when to tell myself: “I’m not what they are looking for”. And instead of providing myself with a self preserving mantra I can assert this as simply a statement of fact. That is comforting.
3 comments:
I have long believed that one needs to take the time necessary to get to know, truly know, who you are. It is a difficult task to recognize, embrace and ultimately accept one's short comings, and one's strengths. But, as you have expressed, amazing things happen when you take the time to do just that.
You're right. Its interesting because art, like everything else, works as a microcosm of the world we experience. So what I learn there, will indeed benefit as I apply it to the "real world" (sic) ;-)
One's type is always a tricky thing and shifts constantly in subtle ways. So many opinions about the type your friends think you are vs. what you think vs. what strangers think. Your friends know you better than strangers who cast and may tell you that they could see you as such-and-such a thing. The casting director who doesn't know you would not know a side of you that your friends know, a side which may expand your type options.
Arrghhh!
I agree with hscfree and would add that you NEVER stop discovering who you are and you will never know 100% who you are. What kind of journey would that be? I think it is even more important to learn how to be accepting of who you are. Not to say you should stop challenging yourself. On the contrary. Part of who you are (and I mean YOU as I know you) is very similar to many of us in that a part of you is always wanting to learn to do things better. That should be honored. Me? I've essentially shifted my focus from stage (aside from a few readings and very show gigs here and there) to screen. It affords me more time to develop some other skills that will serve me far better when (and if) I re-enter the stage world proper.
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